YESTERDAY'S SPORTING RESULTS due to the severe weather conditions yesterday,
most sporting activities were abandoned, but there are always some stupid wankers who just had to do it,
even when it is fucking torture outside and you should just stay in bed
THE FODDLEBURG HALF MARATHON
1. Ali Reallyneedakip (Senegal) 1 hour 20 mins. 10 secs
2. Rush Tothefinish (USA) 1 hour 20 mins. 11 secs
3. Crap Inzepants (Germany) 1 hour 20 mins. 12 secs.
RUGBY RESULTS Dire division
Sultans of Swing 205 TV Writers 3
Can you see what it is yet?
JOIN THE DOTS
Save the photo, print it out and then join the dots
JOKE OF THE MONTH
A lesbian girl takes her straight workmate girlfriend to a gay bar for the very first time.
She asked everyone to please show respect to her as she was not gay.
The butch busty barmaid laughed out loud.
"I will christen her spaghetti."
Everyone except the gay friend laughed.
"Okay" she said, "against my better judgement,I will bite. Why do you call her spaghetti?"
the busty barmaid laughed and answered:
"Because,spaghetti is also straight until it is made wet."
Fun for the whole family on a rainy day or to pass the time if you are just a bored shitless big baby
Once upon a time, not so long ago in the Wibbly Wobbly Forrest, lived a very jolly man called Ole Jeremias Asswipe, Although he was a big, very fat man, he was also a very happy man and he loved to laugh all the time, sometimes laughing so hard his haemorrhoids hurt and he had to get Mr Squinky the squirrel to rub his very special ointment on his haemorrhoids and that was something Mr Squinky really fucking hated,
because although Ole
Jeremias was a happy
man, he was also a
dirty Ole bastard and
never really washed
his ass correctly and
there was always shit
and stuff caught up in
his bum fluff and that
really pissed Squinky
off. So as soon as he heard Jeremias laugh and scream.
”O! O! Looks like me haemorrhoids need a seeing too, I wonder where Mr Squinky is?”
well, he was off like Usain Bolt on 300 cups of coffee.
Pongo's bedtime story
OleJeremias & the Wibbly Wobbly forest
with old man Smelopoop
Perv, the man with hemmerhoids, the bitch and the utter wanking cunting nob-jockey,the one armed woman,the slut,the clapping spaz,the one that weed himself
The wibbly wobbly Forest was situated next to Glumsville, where everyone did and acted the same as everyone else, day in day out, week after week, month after month, year after year. All the fucking time until they died. Monotone doesn't even come near how boring they were. They did, however, have one joy in life, something called sarcasm. They love to do it all the time and they never gave a shit about the feelings of the other.
Anyway, most people of Glumsville avoided the Wibbly Wobbly forest for fear of bumping into Ole Jeremias and maybe catching his most awful of happiness bugs and they too would start laughing and being silly and that honestly will just not do in their safe normal world, where everything is fine and dandy and nobody smiles or gives another a compliment.because then that would break the golden rules of life of Glumsville always do what your parents did and especially do not enjoy life and never ever ever ever try to be original, because people just not do that. Life was only meant for serving their masters and dying just after retirement age.
But, Ole Jeremias did not mind that the citizens of Glumsville never called or came to see him, because he was actually very happy in his Wibbly Wobbly forest and not one of those bastards will take that away from him. For him, they could all go and fuck themselves.
And guess what children, Ole Jeremias, well he lived happily ever after.
But tell me, who do you want to be like, Children? I know I want to be like Ole Jeremias.
Next time, we will have more stories from the Wibbly Wobbly forest, but for now, I must help Ole Jeremius find Mr Squinky......where is he?
'O! Mr Squnky......!!!!!!!”